Fragment #31 – A Green Soothing

When I wake up this morning, there’s a warmth missing next to me. I take a pillow and hug it. I close my eyes tighter and go back to sleep.
I dream of something which makes me shake and sweat. I don’t remember what it is, but I wake up in a sudden, all shivering.
Jon is not here anymore.
I go to the bathroom, and knock on the door. “Is it Jon?”
“No, it’s me, Granny answers. Jon left this morning. I don’t know where he went.”
I shake.
He can’t have left like that. He can’t have left me alone again. He knows I can’t live without him.
First Julian, then him. It is not possible. I can’t believe it.
I go downstairs, go through the living room and the kitchen. Calling him.
Granddad is in front of the TV, watching the news. When I ask him if he saw Jonathan, he answers back an inunderstandable “mmm”.
I go outside, and start going down the sloppy road. Where can he be?
I go past the Tesco, the small café and the car handwash. No-one. It is too early.
I cross the street and go into the Heath.
I can feel some soothing from the trees. Dogs are running, along with their masters.
The pounds are calm, and swans with dark feathers stare at me.
I just need to lie and calm down.
Where can he be?

One hour and a half afterwards, I wake up again, and stand. People are starting to run through the park, children are smiling, sweaty men are playing tennis. There even are grandmas in the bowling green.
I feel better. Jon should be somewhere. He surely had to do something. He can’t have gone without me.

When I open the house’s door, Jon is waiting for me, next to Granny.
She smiles at me. They both shout at me a loud “April Fool”.
Jon was with Granny in the bathroom. They thought it very funny to make me think that he had left.
I can help smiling back.
Let us continue with our lives.