Fragment #44 - Need for seduction

I'm looking around. I'm not getting used to this new place yet. Sarah's new place. A flat in Shawlands, very nice area, close to the pubs and that club I quite liked when I was an assistant, the Shed. Maybe we could go back there with some friends. I found this area was far from the West End. But I'm here tonight.... Alison might like that, she lives in Cardonald. Anyway. That flat reminds me of other people, other places, things that happened a few years ago now, and it doesn't feel right. But I'll get used to the idea she is living here now. That my wee sister is settling in, on her own, in Glasgow...

Let's focuse back on now and on people. Not too much people, but still a nice noisy party. Sarah seems to be over there in the kitchen with a guy who, if I remember well, is her flatmate. If I wasn't thinking how bad an idea is this, I would say she is actually flirting with that man. Tall, older looks, dark hair, loud talks, I guess he is the american one. Can't remember. But if he is the american one, his name is Sean.

My glass is empty. This is the chance to stand up, get to the kitchen, try and talk to some people. Where is Mark? What was the point of coming together, he is now talking with that girl, the blond who is, I think, one of Sarah's friends from the bar. Coming very close to her. Closer. Closer. This is gross, he is going to kiss her, just like that, does he even know her name? What do I look like now?

I should look nice. I've been shopping today. One of my after-break up shopping fevers. I need new clothes, to start over. Some would say I'm trying to buy myself a new life. Screw them. It does work. Take care of yourself and start over. I bought pretty feminine clothes, maybe a bit more than I would usually wear. So I'm wearing a nice black mini skirt and a white loose top, with a deep cleavage. New silvery shoes. High heels of course. I do look good. Why am I jealous of that girl with Mark then? Am I jealous of her, of them, of him? Let's stand up and get another...

I stumble. Ooops, have I been drinking too much?

...

Who cares... Let's get another drink. And then... Let's get back on tracks. I don't want to come back home on my own tonight...