Fragment #64 - Mario

This morning I woke up earlier than the three others. I asked the hostel’s staff how I could go on the Internet. I paid ten minutes access. I go on my email account, find this email Mario sent me in April. Answer. I am thinking again, about yesterday. He wasn’t there. Of course he wasn’t. I asked about him, when I went to check on our return tickets – lame excuse, I know… I didn’t want Sarah and the guys to know the whole thing, this weird encounter, the obsession I have now to see him again, maybe because of this dream I had when taking sleeping pills… I am already the crazy one having to see a shrink, I don’t need to make things worse. The woman I asked to don’t even know him – or at least that’s what I understood. Does he really exist? Well, having the email in front of me on the screen is helping me not feeling completely crazy. “Hey! Ahora debes estar por Córdoba, también es una ciudad bonita, aunque Sevilla lo es más. Espero que disfrutaras de tus días en mi ciudad y de que quieras volver otra vez (sin alumnos jejeje)." And so on, I am really not at ease with this language. Maybe this is why I never answered: I wanted to, I intended to study some Spanish again and be able to write him a proper email but whatever, life goes on, and you don’t find time. I write quickly, in English, that I’m in Seville and I would like to see him. I give my phone number, and the hostel address. Sent. I feel stupid, but it’s so right. I feel deep inside of me that we are connected and that I cannot be in Seville and not see him. I am looking blankly at the computer’s screen. A hand touches my shoulder, gently. “Amélie? Tu viens?” Sarah wants me to come. She is looking at me questioning. We are in holidays abroad to avoid nonstop emails and calls so why would I want… I explain her something about Glasgow’s news I needed to check, the Glasgow and the world’s website. I go on explaining that I actually found out that my favourite magazine was the one that woman who’s been kidnapped a few weeks ago was working at. Small world… And she buys this all, and my little secret about the mystery Spanish man is safe…